Healing Technique: Internal Family Systems Therapy

This is a summary of the Internal Family Systems theory (IFS) in the books Internal Family Systems Therapy by Richard Schwartz and Martha Sweezy and Internal Family Systems: Skills Training Manual by Frank Anderson, Martha Sweezy, and Richard Schwartz. IFS is a theory that harnesses the body's subconscious wisdom to heal itself. Here is a fantastic video about how this theory looks in practice.

IFS is founded on the idea that every human being is dynamic and has many different aspects, or parts, of themselves that sometimes want different things. It uses externalizing, a therapeutic technique that helps a person emotionally disengage from their emotions by making the emotions a separate entity from themself, to help their "self" speak to the parts in their body that would typically emotionally overwhelm them and release whatever the body is holding on to emotionally. The self in IFS refers to a completely whole and healed aspect of you at your core that is beneath the wounded parts.

There are three primary roles that a part (of the body) can take:

1. Exile - "The parts who have been exploited, rejected, or abandoned in external relationships, and then subjected to negative judgments from other parts of the system." The parts of ourself that we repress.

2. Manager - The parts that manage and control the exiled parts so that they don't overwhelm and destroy the system. The silencers that try to prevent oneself from falling apart by silencing the parts of oneself that would cause them to fall apart.

3. Firefighter - The parts that react to an escaped exile in an attempt to distract from or suppress the exiled part. This typically manifests as destructive tendencies like substance abuse, self harm, addiction of other sorts, dissociation, sexual risk taking, etc.

The exiles are the parts of ourself we've neglected and ignored, the parts we fear about ourselves, which just get louder and louder until we are forced to address them. The manager and firefighter are the protectors that assume we won't survive if our darkest shadows are faced and confronted. Healing comes from listening to and validating all parts of ourself, but particularly those parts of ourself that have been exiled. In order to talk to the exiled part, one must first go through the managers and firefighters.

The objective of talking to any part is to first make it feel heard and validated. Here are some examples of questions the book gives in order to understand the part and get its permission to make changes:

• Why are you saying or doing this [behavior]?

• What do you really want for [the person]?

• What are you afraid would happen if you stopped doing or saying this?

• If [the person] were able to keep [the feared consequence] from happening so you could quit this job and do anything you wanted to do, what would that be?

• Would you like to use to help you get into that new role?

The first objective is to appease all managers and firefighters, the protectors, that don't want you to talk to the exiled part by allowing them a voice and understanding them so that they are willing to step down and allow you to try and talk to the exiled part. This must be done with permission from the managers and firefighters. Any emotion that would inhibit you from addressing the exiled part is an indicator of a protector. Simply asking if there are any parts that have objections to talking to the exiled part, or externalizing any emotions that would get in the way of curiosity about the exiled part, should suffice to root out all of the protectors. Get them all to feel comfortable stepping down so that you can talk to the exile means that you've completed step 1. If many protector parts are involved, one technique the book suggests is having them all sit down at a conference table together so that all protector parts can get on the same page. Another technique the book suggests to accurately distinguish a protector part from an exile is to ask the part "who do you protect?" An exiled part does not protect any other part.

The second step is to talk to the exiled part. After understanding and validating the exiled part and getting it's permission to try having your self take charge of it's role, have the exiled part release all the emotions it's been holding on to in whatever way it sees fit. After all emotions are discharged, have the exiled part fill itself with whatever positive emotions it would like to replace the negative emotions with. Once this is all complete, the exiled part should be happy and may occupy whatever place it would like to in your mind as it's now at peace.

One interesting concept is that of legacy burdens. Legacy burdens are emotions or beliefs a person has taken on generationally that aren't from anything they've done while alive. In order to release legacy burdens, ask what percent of the belief or emotions belong to someone else and then ask to release any percent that isn't yours.

With some people who have experienced severe trauma, they do not feel safe to access their self. Check if any protectors are concerned with the person embodying their self before accessing it for this population.

IFS can also be used with medical conditions.

1. See if a part is attached to the symptom.

2. If not, ask if any part within yourself has information about the symptom.

3. Check for parts that fear or hate the symptom and address them.

4. Ask to talk to parts that know how to heal the body.